It must know me pretty well, because this is totally something I’d wear.  And after weeks of constantly infiltrating the sidebars of blogs I read with suggestions based on my browsing history, I’m sold on cherry aprons. I give in, okay? Send me two.

I’ve been scouting home decor- since, you know, I have a home now- and I just adore this naughty, spank-me-worthy spice decanter from Comunistar.  It kinda resembles a fembot, right?  Anyway, good design, but definitely also a conversation piece.

Okay, so I haven’t posted since last Thursday.  It’s been a busy couple of units of time.  I had to move out of my apartment, on pretty short notice at that. It takes forfuckingever to find a place in the naked city, and after a few eh experiences, I found a commune in Newark to move to.  So most of my time has been spent singing kum-ba-yah, smoking pot, and arguing over whose cruelty-free tofu burgers are in whose freezer.  I’m kidding, you can totally get in trouble for saying stuff like that on your blog nowadays.  And besides, would I eat a tofu burger?  And it’s actually sort of co-housing, not a commune.  In Newark of all places.

So living in a commune loft is actually pretty cool.  It’s mostly boys, so there are no estrogen fueled hysterics.  Plus, it’s a cool old converted factory, so I get to build all up in it. And I can rollerskate here.  Some things that make co-housing situations overall better, IMHO- or, my loot:

These are my shiny red pots.  Awesome, awesome pots.  Top marks.

A sexy robe…

This tool makes you Macgyver in like three seconds.  The rub?  You need one of these motherfuckers to open it!

Lighting!  I did this all by myself.  The cords came from IKEA, but you can get them and the shades from Pearl River.

BE dropped us a line to let us know about the new Vixen vinyl dress- and predictably- LOVE it! Also digging the new Lucy B retro styles of lingerie. Since there’s free shipping on $75+ orders, you might want to start your holiday shopping early.

You think you can handle this badonkadonkdonk?

And for under your suit…

In my never ending quest for comfy, cute slips, I stumbled across this adorable sale piece from- wait for it- the Gap.  Soft red cotton trimmed with wide lace strips.  It’s sexy and practical.  Kinda like me.

…and you shouldn’t be all cliche and expect a boy to necessarily get you one.  It’s a two-way street, you know…

Vice Vixen is going on vacation! While I won’t be able to abandon you totally, I will be on a limited posting schedule. Probably 5-7 posts weekly. So don’t despair, oh three readers of mine.

But I’ll be doing field research! Drinking, smoking, getting it on, and tearing up the countryside with a very cute boy. Think of all the stories I’ll have when I get back!

I am on an eternal quest for comfortable, adorable boyshorts.  I can never have enough, and I never feel like I have enough.  I picked up a three pack of these lacy numbers at Target this Saturday, and they’re truly amazing.  They stay put, look adorable, and you don’t even feel them all day.  Top marks, I’m definitely stocking up!

This pricey little number is patently adorable.  A heart charm, Swarovski crystals, and gorgeous bright feather cuffs are light, sweet, and totally romantic.  I love their innocent feel because being tied up is totally naughty.

My lifelong ambition has always been to be a kick-ass girl assassin. I have a thing for weapons themed accessories, and I always wanna strap stuff to my thighs. Lipstick, ATM cards, you name it. I don’t know why cell phone thigh garters haven’t caught on, but I want one. It looks especially convenient for skating. And it comes with a matching g-string. You can make your boyfriend wear it and snap pics with your cell.